Date rape

      We often hear about ‘Date Rape’, especially during festive season when it is party time. It has become an unwanted companion to the festive spirit of year-end parties. ‘Unwanted’, yes, but not unavoidable! Usually, it means a sexual assault by an acquaintance without consent. ‘Drug assisted sexual assault’ is another term used when the act is committed  under the influence of drugs. The most commonly used drug is alcohol. At least twenty other drugs have been identified which are used for this purpose.

     If we use the word ‘rape’ in a broader sense of ‘intrusion upon our private space’, we do hear about many such instances. For many adolescents, these parties are the first experience of ‘freedom and fun’. Often, a girl describes going to a party, drinking what she thought was a soft drink.  She wakes up in a strange place without any recollection of the intervening period. This can also happen when a stranger offers something to eat or drink during a journey. The possibilities of what can happen during that period are endless; rape, torture, kidnapping, filming, publishing it on social media, blackmail..... Most of the ‘Date Rape’ drugs are tasteless and colourless, act rapidly; produce disinhibition, relaxation of voluntary muscles and lasting aterograde amnesia (memory loss for events that occur under the influence of the drug). There is passivity and a loss of will to resist. On restoration of consciousness, there is drowsiness, confusion, dizziness and unsteadiness. Because of the amnesia and the nature of the crime, victim reports it after days or does not report at all!   

     Generally, there is a lot of noise and confusion at such parties. It becomes easy for people to spike your drink or to tamper with your alcohol. As time flows, so does alcohol. The inhibitions relax. The effect of alcohol and sometimes drugs, the loud thumping music and crazy dancing form a heady mixture. The mind is taken to a zone where only enjoyment matters. And to hell with the consequences!

    So, how to avoid getting into a tight spot? The maximum number of rapes happen between close friends and acquaintances. So be prepared. Keep your eyes open. Exercise your right to say ‘no’. Avoid going to lonely places with your male friend. Remember, somebody else’s idea of pleasure may be different from yours! So do not give in to pressure. Never accept an opened drink or leave your drink unattended. If you happen to go to the toilet, discard the remaining drink and take a fresh one. Avoid getting drunk. Avoid group drinking and drinking games. Always have a network of friends, a buddy system, checking on each other from time to time. If you feel funny, report to your trusted friends or arrange to go home. Moreover, avoid going to strange parties thrown by casual acquaintances. Also, do not accept food offered by a stranger during travels.

New Year parties are to be enjoyed and not regretted!